I get the BEST spam

[Matt Morrison]

I literally could have picked from hundreds of these little blighters from my Junk E-mail folder, but here's just one.
No links, no dodgy attachments, no pictures, just utterly weird text.
I have no idea what these sort of messages are supposed to achieve, but they do make great stories. Enjoy.

i recommend rounding your troops for a similar conversation, and a brainstorm session for how to prepare for what lies ahead. just sayin.
kiss me, i'm irish
it was super delicious.
i mean, look at her hair.
we are happily enjoying being able to play outside again.
haha, that's my girl.
see you then!
pps- our topic of convo for the night was this article from the wall street journal.
let's give a hand to the world, for everything it can do!!
interested? i think it would be so fun.
she's cute - trust me, you'll want her working her magic on you.
(so is corned beef if you've never tried it).
i am not going to worry...about a thing. where you can get great steak and shrimp
i love that she's an expert knitter and yet chooses to create very simple pieces;
i was given the irish name kelly after my great grandparents' last name.
have a happy st. patrick's day.
i want those red boots and that coat.
my happy plans for this evening include knitting and watching two favorite movies: far and away followed by tristan and isolde
ps- did i say i would sew this past saturday? i meant next saturday! haha!
the ms craft dept was featured in an article, and their personal crafting projects were shown.
i LOVE this picture and am so inspired to keep the needles moving.

i don't worry about a little "creative clutter" in cate's room. i say, a good dress up/ barbie mess day better than watching tv all afternoon, right? pretty soon i will just put my 'kerchief on again and go to town. (yes, that is what cate's room looks like again, just over a month after the big clean. i tell you, i'm fighting a losing battle with that girl). does that answer your question, mary? i hope it helps! wink.

here's an irish blessing from us to you...
my sister and hair stylist, coco, is coming to utah county once again to meet our hair needs.

simple is always prettiest to me.
corned beef is cheap meat, a head of cabbage is less than 50 cents, and i bet you have all the ingredients for the bread in your cupboard. you should make this meal tonight!

when you need to be home, may you find your way.
may the light always find you on a dreary day.

really, cate is also mexican, japanese, native american, swiss, and a lot more- a true american- so we actually have a lot of family history travelling to do, but i really love the romantic beauty of ireland, and have always been drawn to that part of the world. plus i really love corned beef.

[Kai Laddiman]

On this subject, the King of Nigeria just sent me an e-mail; what should I do?

[Debbi Flack]

On this subject, the King of Nigeria just sent me an e-mail; what should I do?

Easy - just send them ALL your personal information and they will send you a cheque for £42 million! Sounds fair. And don't worry because even though this might look like a scam it really really isn't!!!

The sad part is there's probably more than one person who's fallen for it.

[Kai Laddiman]

On this subject, the King of Nigeria just sent me an e-mail; what should I do?

Easy - just send them ALL your personal information and they will send you a cheque for £42 million! Sounds fair. And don't worry because even though this might look like a scam it really really isn't!!!

The sad part is there's probably more than one person who's fallen for it.

Fallen for what?

[Gavin Chipper]

On this subject, the King of Nigeria just sent me an e-mail; what should I do?

Easy - just send them ALL your personal information and they will send you a cheque for £42 million! Sounds fair. And don't worry because even though this might look like a scam it really really isn't!!!

The sad part is there's probably more than one person who's fallen for it.

Fallen for what?

Fallen for thinking it's a scam when it's not.

[Jon O'Neill]

I've just got a great one which beat Hotmail's junk filter. Wall of text trying to get me to sign up to this webcam thing or some shit. I've bolded my favourite parts.

OMG how have u been? I know we havent chatted in a while! totally my fault.. this computer im using freezes all the time. i have tired ot email you a few times with no luck.. ach! sooo sorry.. so whats been up? i am finally moving near you in a couple days.. i hope u didnt forget me? its me amdison lol.. in case u DID forget, we met on ms or cl not long ago.. so im gonna be living right near you and i dont know ANYBODY OMG SHOOT ME! i have my uncle and aunt there but thats not the same.. so can u show me around? help me find a job lol.. i get there next friday late afternoon.. im gonna nee dyour cell number also..ps - im recently single too so u can take me out and show me some real fun * wink wink * hahahha! so anyways im soo nervous about moving. its a load off my back that im gonna know someone there though. so i am happy we met online hehe I am hoping u dont have a girlfriend.. i am not a big fan of drama and stuff like that so just tell me if u do..SO I kinda think we should chat a little bit more before we meet. just to make sure we are not awkward and stuff. although i can talk forever about anything with anyone lol. u will notice that right away when we meet. so are u free friday to help me move some boxes and stuff? i hope so since i wont know anyone maybe u could also introduce me to some of you friends? are they nice? i am cool with gurls and guys lol.. guess u could say i am bisexual but whatever what girl isnt these days..so back to YOU mister... remind me what u do for work? for fun? what are your hobbies and what do you like sexually ? we have so mucht o get ot know about each other in such little time lol! as i mentioned i recently broke up with my ex. we were together for about 6 months but there was too much drama and my friends and fmaily hate dhim. he had no job and was quite disrespectful.. was also pretty lousy in bed.. i like foreplay and he always just wanted to go right to sex.. at least get me wet first ya know? selfish idiot. anyways so i feel free again now that i am single but i do kinda miss having that special someone to cuddle with ya know? so ur probably wondering how come i am moving right? well its a long story.. basicly i am broke for starters.. add to that the fact that i need to go back to school AND the fact that i ned a fresh start and there u go.. so i am gonna move and hopefully solve all 3 of those problems, the most stressfull one is my debt. off); and my new coat is woven from the blackest shearings for three miles i owe 8k on my visa ewwww. also i am trying to help my sister pay off her tuition fees also so shes counting on me. Speaking of which, do you have any good hookups to help me find a job? i would LOVE to be a bartender or somehting like that where I can make tips. I think i have a good look for it plus I am SUPER friendly. so here is some random stuff about me. i love star gazing, the outdoors, porn, foreplay, massages, the internet, shopping, doing my nails, sex, cooking, and watching movies. when it comes ot guys i just want someone who treats me the way i deserve to be treated. i can be such a good girlfriend and a total freak in bed. i am up for just about ANYTHING sexually.. serioulsy As for my current job doesnt pay that well but coming from where I lived it was my only real option. I am sure I told u about it but if i didnt i really hope u dont look down on me for it and can accept me for who i am. See I do this webcam thing where I basicly get paid to chat to people on cam and tease around a bit. I know its not the most MORAL job out there but i am desperate for money and its pretty easy money. i wanna get a real job though and thats another reason why i am moving. The job suits me cause i like tlaking to people and i am quite dirty minded so its the best of both worlds and i get paid for it hehe.. Anyways here is what i was thinking.. since my computer SUCKS and its hard for me to chat by email or instant messenger.. why dont u come chat me at my work site? i can totally get u in for free.. i have 2 free passes a month to share with whoever i like.. i havent ever given any out but i dont mind giving u one as we totally need to chat before i move. see you can login as a customer but ill give u a special link where u dont pay or get billed anything. its a special vip backdooor link... this woudl be the best palce for us to chat cause i am online all the time now trying to save as much money as possible for the move..also i will kick any other chatters out when i see u sign in. does this work for u? i understand if ur not cool with it.. i kno theres a lot of scammers out there so if u dont wanna chat there then i guess ill email u in a few weeks when i get my internet all set up in the new place. although i woudl really feel more comfortable chating wiht u before i move.if u do decide to come chat me online then u have to PROMISE me that u will not share the vip link with anyone.. for any reason.. its for YOU only baby i am trusting u.. once u sign in we can chat and u can see me on webcam also if u have one u can go on too.. oh la la hot.. and of ocurse u wudnt pay me for it ur my friend DUH! I am trusting u not to abuse it though cause once u sign in u can watch ohter girls naked for free too and i wudnnt want that.. YOUR EyeS BETTER ONLY BE ON ME hahahahha!! unless of course we watch them together and gave me leave to put on my clothes again, for I was So i am trusting u.. so u can trust me.. the link is at the bottom of the email. remember not to give it to anyone under any circumstances! i am online right now if u wanna come chat now.. its dead in here.. please come also.. u obvioulsy need a cc to sign into the site but thats just to prove u are not a minor...it says right on the vip link that its free since u are vip and u wont get billed anything.. ok im getting off here now.. im waiting for u baby. cant wait to see u and meet u and hug u and kiss u.. ciao for now.. xoxox ----> localchatcamconnect . com/free (take out the spaces obvioulsy heheh)

----- Original Message ----

Sent: Monday, July 11, 2011 70:49:59 AM


how,precious,time,is,,or,what,a,task,we,have,in,hand.


----- Forwarded Message ----

Doctor,,you,don't,know,what,it,is,to,doubt,everything,,even,yourself.
"Come!" he said. "You are a man, and it is a man we want. You are better than me, better than my friend John." Arthur looked bewildered, and the Professor went on by explaining in a kindly way.

[Jon Corby]

So what does she look like?

[Jon O'Neill]

So what does she look like?

Dunno, signing up now. Can I borrow your credit card?

[Phil Reynolds]

when it comes ot guys i just want someone who treats me the way i deserve to be treated

So, like a total slut?

[Matt Morrison]

Just got a bit of spam that started by referring to me as "Captain Teeth".

[Michael Wallace]

I got some spam today offering to edit my thesis, one of their 'features' was "Ruthlessly accurate references".