c4countdown

Greetings from Illinois, home of the Simpsons....Doh.
in case those of you interested (or those who aint foed me),are wondering where I've been, I have been gagged for a week by Charlie (the first time he's done it, he says).
In retrospect, it was probably deserved, however I think forumites should have been told IMO.
Anyway the reason for this thread is because I want to put myself in virtual stocks so that you can all throw your rotten tomatoes at me (or a few bocquets, I hope).

If this thread does not get any replies by the weekend, Iwill be forced to leave as it would be no point in posting if my opinions aint wanted.
Oh and I unresevervedly apologise to all recipients of my death threats irregardless (is there such a word?) of their comedy merit.

First

Saved you.

Marc Meakin wrote:Message subject: Next time you try to kill yourself do it properly
From: Marc Meakin
Sent: Thu Nov 18, 2010 3:57 am
To: David O'Donnell

Post Reply

Message
Plus it will save me the job.
I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE......
The death certificate will say auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Okay that's a little funny and I know I haven't come out whiter than white over this sanctum experience. I wrote some stuff when I was drunk and thinking no-one's gonna take this seriously, like a normal post only worse. I realise I am one of the worst offenders on Jeff Clayton's thread, a guy I have not really spoken to. I think he may be a bit boring and that his girlfriend is attractive but I want it publicly on the record that I have no idea of the exact size of his penis, what I proffered was merely guesswork. I have never seen Jeff Clayton's penis nor I am pre-disposed to encountering that situation. Therefore, I retract the conclusion of one of the comments I made regarding Jeff Clayton.

Why am I discussing Clayton in a Meakin thread? Only to make it clear that I not only do not retract my comments about you but to emphasise that I think you are a complete prick. You are as funny as blood on toilet paper; a hot dose of crabs; a diagnosis of cancer; and dare I say it Jim Davidson's warm-up act. I stand by everything I said about you in the sanctum, you miserable cunt.

_________________

David O'Donnell wrote:

Marc Meakin wrote:Message subject: Next time you try to kill yourself do it properly
From: Marc Meakin
Sent: Thu Nov 18, 2010 3:57 am
To: David O'Donnell

Post Reply

Message
Plus it will save me the job.
I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE......
The death certificate will say auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Okay that's a little funny and I know I haven't come out whiter than white over this sanctum experience. I wrote some stuff when I was drunk and thinking no-one's gonna take this seriously, like a normal post only worse. I realise I am one of the worst offenders on Jeff Clayton's thread, a guy I have not really spoken to. I think he may be a bit boring and that his girlfriend is attractive but I want it publicly on the record that I have no idea of the exact size of his penis, what I proffered was merely guesswork. I have never seen Jeff Clayton's penis nor I am pre-disposed to encountering that situation. Therefore, I retract the conclusion of one of the comments I made regarding Jeff Clayton.

Why am I discussing Clayton in a Meakin thread? Only to make it clear that I not only do not retract my comments about you but to emphasise that I think you are a complete prick. You are as funny as blood on toilet paper; a hot dose of crabs; a diagnosis of cancer; and dare I say it Jim Davidson's warm-up act. I stand by everything I said about you in the sanctum, you miserable cunt.

_________________

I am not miserable.

Jon Corby wrote:First

Saved you.

Just for that I will PM you a death threat, your choice of exit.
What will be your valediction, I wonder?
Wouldn't want you to feel left out, oh and while I'm at it Jim Bently got off scott free didn't he lol.

Then I apologise yet again; you're just unfunny and a cunt.

David O'Donnell wrote:Then I apologise yet again; you're just unfunny and a cunt.

Let the (normal/sober) people decide.

I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

Marc Meakin wrote:

David O'Donnell wrote:Then I apologise yet again; you're just unfunny and a cunt.

Let the (normal/sober) people decide.

The people who send death threats at 03:57?

There once was a man (?!) Meakin,
Mass approval he was often seekin'.
For every failed joke,
A death threat he'd invoke.
But it's from his arse these'd be leakin'.

Charlie Reams wrote:I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

I don't know if you're joking Charlie but I do think Marc is fine and he knows that. Obviously the puns and whatnot are taken a bit too far but I suppose that is just Marc. As much as I laughed at your posts David I think it is time to say "enough is enough".

Charlie Reams wrote:I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

You do know the words ' I think you're alright' will be used out of context by me, when it suits me lol

Ryan Taylor wrote:

Charlie Reams wrote:I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

I don't know if you're joking Charlie but I do think Marc is fine and he knows that. Obviously the puns and whatnot are taken a bit too far but I suppose that is just Marc. As much as I laughed at your posts David I think it is time to say "enough is enough".

Nah, not going to let this one go.

If you want me to explain my conduct in the sanctum then just ask; if you want to call me out then call me out. Meakin's made his choice.

Ryan Taylor wrote:

Charlie Reams wrote:I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

I don't know if you're joking Charlie but I do think Marc is fine and he knows that. Obviously the puns and whatnot are taken a bit too far but I suppose that is just Marc. As much as I laughed at your posts David I think it is time to say "enough is enough".

Nope, not a joke.

To answer the original question, I vote "neither of the above".

There once was a man named Mark;
Whose jokes were transported by Ark.
Originally in Latin,
So misshapen an' shat in,
Humour leaves him in the dark.

David O'Donnell wrote:

Ryan Taylor wrote:

Charlie Reams wrote:I think you're alright, and your non-flounce deserves some credit. I ask only that you exercise a little more quality control over your sense of humour.

I don't know if you're joking Charlie but I do think Marc is fine and he knows that. Obviously the puns and whatnot are taken a bit too far but I suppose that is just Marc. As much as I laughed at your posts David I think it is time to say "enough is enough".

Nah, not going to let this one go.

If you want me to explain my conduct in the sanctum then just ask; if you want to call me out then call me out. Meakin's made his choice.

What part of 'I apologise unreservedly' did you not understand dickwad.

David O'Donnell wrote:There once was a man named Mark;
Whose jokes were transported by Ark.
Originally in Latin,
So misshapen an' shat in,
Humour leaves him in the dark.

Just for the record, who makes you laugh.
Btw it's Marc.
Would have sent you a poem back but nothing decent rhymes with either david or O' Donnell although I wish Twat did.

Marc Meakin wrote:Greetings from Illinois, home of the Simpsons....Doh.
in case those of you interested (or those who aint foed me),are wondering where I've been, I have been gagged for a week by Charlie (the first time he's done it, he says).
In retrospect, it was probably deserved, however I think forumites should have been told IMO.
Anyway the reason for this thread is because I want to put myself in virtual stocks so that you can all throw your rotten tomatoes at me (or a few bocquets, I hope).

If this thread does not get any replies by the weekend, Iwill be forced to leave as it would be no point in posting if my opinions aint wanted.
Oh and I unresevervedly apologise to all recipients of my death threats irregardless (is there such a word?) of their comedy merit.

Someone missed an oppertunity ,there greetings from Illinois cos I am ill and I annoy (ya boo sucks DOD)

Marc Meakin wrote:

David O'Donnell wrote:There once was a man named Mark;
Whose jokes were transported by Ark.
Originally in Latin,
So misshapen an' shat in,
Humour leaves him in the dark.

Just for the record, who makes you laugh.
Btw it's Marc.
Would have sent you a poem back but nothing decent rhymes with either david or O' Donnell although I wish Twat did.

Don't be daft, Marc, there are loads of ways to parody Doddy.

E.g.
There was a young feller named Doddy
Who when drinkin' was always quite oddy
But O Doddy: your mouth!
Limerick's in the South
William Burke's a Tyrone man - you got me?

Limericks eh? Okay, here goes:

This forum has characters odd,
There's Jon and there's Marc and there's DOD.
Marcs jokes are weak(ish)*
DOD drinks like a fish,*
And Corby's more upright than God.*


*All sentiments, character traits etc. expressed here are purely for effect . No offence is intended or should be taken.

Liam Tiernan wrote:Limericks eh? Okay, here goes:

This forum has characters odd,
There's Jon and there's Marc and there's DOD.
Marcs jokes are weak(ish)*
DOD drinks like a fish,*
And Corby's more upright than God.*


*All sentiments, character traits etc. expressed here are purely for effect . No offence is intended or should be taken.

Like

My poem:

There's this dude called Marc. I think it's possible he might be on holiday in America. He should probably make the most of it and go back to c4c when he's bored.

Andy Wilson wrote:My poem:

There's this dude called Marc. I think it's possible he might be on holiday in America. He should probably make the most of it and go back to c4c when he's bored.

lolza

What the fuck. I can't feel my hands.

Ryan Taylor wrote:What the fuck. I can't feel my hands.

is it cold where you are then or do you have capel tunnel and mores the point why are you trying to steer my thread off topic.
If we must go off topic then : you are cordially invited to the engagement of Neanderthal Woman and Fat Sweaty Paedo
time, 1300 place, sanctum headquarters, date April 31st 2011.

'kin hell Doddy, I genuinely thought you were joking about getting a death threat mentioning auto-asphyxiation

After hacking the password of Kirk,
The Sanctum was breached by a jerk
Threads found were all published
on his website (that's rubbish)
Causing Meakin to go quite berserk

Liam Tiernan wrote:And Corby's more upright than God.*

Damn straight. I make the omnipotent look impotent.

Jon Corby wrote:'kin hell Doddy, I genuinely thought you were joking about getting a death threat mentioning auto-asphyxiation

After hacking the password of Kirk,
The Sanctum was breached by a jerk
Threads found were all published
on his website (that's rubbish)
Causing Meakin to go quite berserk

Corby you are a foot
Sorry I meant you are a legend

Marc Meakin wrote:Corby you are a foot

12 inches baby. Even God can't compete (see above).

(I mean above in the thread, not literally heavenwards. You wouldn't be able to see his tiny cock from that distance. Even Mary didn't notice anything.)

BLASPHEMER.......sorry I am staying in a pators house (better than a spaghetti house)

Jon Corby wrote:

Marc Meakin wrote:Corby you are a foot

12 inches baby. Even God can't compete (see above).

(I mean above in the thread, not literally heavenwards. You wouldn't be able to see his tiny cock from that distance. Even Mary didn't notice anything.)

Not much good to him anyway if He's impotent.

It's only just occured to me that because it has been documented that Mary was only 15 when she gave birth to Jesus ergo God is a paedo (and committed statutory rape)
Looks like I'M going to hell, see you there DOD (c'mon guys had to shoe in a DOD reference didn't I )

Marc Meakin wrote:It's only just occured to me that because it has been documented that Mary was only 15 when she gave birth to Jesus ergo God is a paedo (and committed statutory rape)

It's only stat rape if it's against the law of the country, which it wasn't at the time, and that it actually happens, which it didn't.

Marc Meakin wrote:Looks like I'M going to hell, see you there DOD (c'mon guys had to shoe in a DOD reference didn't I )

You're both going to Norway together?

Liking all the limericks.

Lesley Hines wrote:

Marc Meakin wrote:

David O'Donnell wrote:There once was a man named Mark;
Whose jokes were transported by Ark.
Originally in Latin,
So misshapen an' shat in,
Humour leaves him in the dark.

Just for the record, who makes you laugh.
Btw it's Marc.
Would have sent you a poem back but nothing decent rhymes with either david or O' Donnell although I wish Twat did.

Don't be daft, Marc, there are loads of ways to parody Doddy.

There once was a man named O'Donnell;
Mae'r limrig ’ma bach yn wahanol:
For the sake of a rhyme
I used Welsh half the time;
Dyw'r canlyniad ddim yn syfrdanol.

There was a young man called O'Dee
Who has taken a dislike to me
I will no longer pun
If he agrees I have won
Or I'll give him a death threat or three.

BTW could someone explain how a thread about opinions on me became 'Jarvis's Poetry Corner' revisited.

Oh and lock the thread now please cos I wanted the last word lol
(c'mon Corby time to spoil it lol)

just pop to the doctors mate