Reasons why apterous is better than sex

[Kieran Child]

Same old format, do add your own!

1) As soon as you've finished one game on apterous, you're ready for another.
2) I can play apterous with 10 different men in a row, and then Phil Jarvis' daughter, and my parents won't be disappointed.
3) I don't have to slip chemicals into Dinos' drink in order to play apterous with him.

[Matt Morrison]

4) Getting SYPHILIS is something to be proud of for once.

[Simon Myers]

You can play apterous with a robot and nobody will think you're a sad gee... err...

[Derek Hazell]

6) The quicker you climax, the more the other person admires you.

[Charlie Reams]

7) The girls love it when you "buzz in" in under 30 seconds.

[Ben Hunter]

4) Getting SYPHILIS is something to be proud of for once.

Nothing's going to beat this.

[Jon Corby]

4) Getting SYPHILIS is something to be proud of for once.

Nothing's going to beat this.

That is brilliant. Take a bow MWM.

[Julie T]

Matt's one is definitely ace!

However, rather than see an end to Kieran's great idea of a thread, a rather feeble:

8) It's the only game I'm likely to play with fit young lads in the early hours of the morning.

[Alec Rivers]

Can't beat Matt, but:

9) Apterous is happy to tell you how well you're performing.

[Jon O'Neill]

10) If I do a poo on my keyboard when I'm playing apterous, it doesn't call the police.
11) If you hug Rachel whilst playing apterous, you don't get a restraining order.

[Charlie Reams]

10) If I do a poo on my keyboard when I'm playing apterous, it doesn't call the police.

Did you mean to post this under Feature Requests, Jonathan?

[Matthew Green]

Apterous isn't 16 yet, but there's still a queue of questionably anonymous men waiting to spend the night with it.

[Kai Laddiman]

I can do it.