c4countdown

Just this morning I was considering the political and socialistical ramifications of the illuminati's dominance over the cognoscenti in that monarchist regime, Countdown. For example we have the well-known Communist Carol Vorderman, whose Trotskyite leanings I find quite distasteful, and the equally extremist Susie Dent who only recently stood (unsuccessfully) as a councillor for the BNP. I began to think - isn't it time for the proletariat to strike back? No sooner had I thought this than I realised I was right, because I always am, except when drunk, which is also always.

Perhaps this new People's Countdown Army could lead by some kind of balding vegetarian messiah? I have no particular candidate in mind, of course, but I will say that we should not be too surprised if he was from some exotic country with a lot of greenery. I meditated on my thoughts for a full 8 seconds (my personal threshold) and then, with this revelation in hand and in heart, I began to run from street to street of my home town shouting "Lo! The Countdown revolution cometh!" while firing off my plastic AK47. This certainly raised some eyebrows and, I hope, some ire amongst the repressed townsfolk.

Unfortunately my adventure was then interrupted when I was swallowed by my own navel.

Bastard, but ....

Thank goodness he apologized to me for acting out of character when I thought I had spoiled a prior Countdown episode.

Perhaps I don't know what a spoiler is.