LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

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Debbi Flack
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LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Debbi Flack »

Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping
This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford :
Dear Mrs. Murray,
While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas stove.
7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.
9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.
10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible' theme.
11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.
12. December 18: Hid in a clothing! rack and when people browsed, yelled 'PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'
13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'
And; last, but not least:
14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.'
She came, she saw - oh well, at least she tried!
Dinos Sfyris
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Re: LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Dinos Sfyris »

It's Emma's fault for dragging me along :)
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Charlie Reams
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Re: LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Charlie Reams »

Excellent, it's like receiving chain email but without a delete button.
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Ben Wilson
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Re: LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Ben Wilson »

Charlie Reams wrote:Excellent, it's like receiving chain email but without a delete button.
Quick reminder here you do have moderatory powers. ;)
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Derek Hazell
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Re: LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Derek Hazell »

I actually love food shopping, although I don't do it in Tesco. I prefer farmers' markets, butchers, Aldi, M&S and Waitrose.

I can even be persuaded to go clothes shopping, so much so that I used to have a female friend who used me as her gay best friend to go shopping with, even though I wasn't gay.
Living life in a gyratory circus kind of way.
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Michael Wallace
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Re: LADIES - Sound like any men you know??

Post by Michael Wallace »

Derek Hazell wrote:even though I wasn't gay.
But you are now?
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