c4countdown

Being on the pro side of the whole swearing debacle I thought it might be interesting to see what weird and wonderful swear words forumites have picked up, made up, or just love to say. Most importantly what is your favourite??? Personally I love compound swear words, especially:

Fuckjob (anything of inadequate means)
Twatwit (anyone of inadequate intelligence)
Thundercunt

Oh and Penwoman of course.

One of my favourite sweary utterances was about ten years ago now, my brother was really annoyed at me for some inconsequential reason or other, and was so pissed off he got his words the wrong way round and told me to "dick off you fuckhead" which I quite enjoyed.

My most used swearer is definitely FUCK. It's fucking beautiful, fucking passionate, fucking powerful, and utterly fucking versatile.

I also say CUNTING and CUNTY waaaaaaaaaay more than I actually say CUNT.

"Fucking" is the only one I use regularly. I generally dislike portmanteau swears, but fucktard is pretty good.

During a particularly long session when we were first building Tilefish, Stewart Holden's frustration got the better of him and he exploded, "Oh piss and wind!" which I thought was beautifully understated.

Dinos, I must have left a lasting impression on you, but the fact that I think the word PENWOMAN is rude will not change. Making a comparison of a woman to a sharp object or lack thereof is not polite in my opinion.

I think adding 'basket' to any swear word tends to work quite well. As Neil Buchanan would say - try it your fucking self.

Arsebiscuits is (are? ) popular my way. Scrattocks, too.

As far as stringing it all together; I often go for just piss bugger and balls.

I once took the surname of my boss (******) and then called a colleague a "******-brain", which was quite effective. I will shield the name of the boss here.

Kevin

Cuntier and cuntiest are popular disallowed words on Apterous.

Anything shouted by demented Iranian wrestler The Iron Sheik often ends up in my repertoire.

Can I tell you all something right now?

My mood is not very light, my lips started to curl and I was about to cry when I just read this thread!

As if we aren't feeling any worse because of the possible staff turnover!

I can't have this because I have something to do today!

Do I have to make another emergency phone call as soon as I get a chance?

Poo-head.

Ben Wilson wrote:Anything shouted by demented Iranian wrestler The Iron Sheik often ends up in my repertoire.

You ever see him on the Who's A Better Professional Wrestler? episode of Kenny vs. Spenny, Ben?
You'd love it. "I'm better than that cocksucker Hulk Hogan and that faggot Ultimate Warrior". Classic.

My problem has been solved.

The most unusual that I recall is once when someone pulled out in front of my Mum when she was driving and she called them a "f*cking c*nty ball!" which was hysterical as it made no sense and shocking as she never says c*nt.

My main swear is 'oh testicles' or 'big old hairy testicles' as the polite way to say b*llocks.

I do also find 'f*ck' goes well in 'oh for f*ck sake!' to express extreme exasperation.

Jason Larsen wrote:Dinos, I must have left a lasting impression on you, but the fact that I think the word PENWOMAN is rude will not change. Making a comparison of a woman to a sharp object or lack thereof is not polite in my opinion.

A perfect example of the way that perjorative words are very subjective, offence is in the eye of the beholder.

Jason, if this thread upsets you, then ignore it. I don't read the 'Marginalised Sexuality' thread in 'General' for that reason.
You don't have to like everything on a forum to enjoy it.

Oh, I almost forgot, Dinos!

Fuck, obviously. Shit, and bollocks too. Arsehole, and occasionally twat. Not very inventive, sorry.

Bloody and bugger, which I use a lot, I hardly regard as swear words. Where I originate, in Lancashire, buggerlugs was a term of endearment.

I rarely apologise, though, but I did when I said 'twat' while driving 2 friends and our children (14, 12, 8 and 6) to a class.
Since some twat had just pulled out in front of me while I was doing 70mph, they were OK about it. A good job I have excellent brakes and reactions.

MOTHERFUCKER is allegedly worse than FUCK according to some people, so MOTHERCUNTER (although meaningless) can be quite fun to use. And of course MOTHERMOTHERCUNTERER.

Thank you, Julie!

Jason Larsen wrote:Dinos, I must have left a lasting impression on you, but the fact that I think the word PENWOMAN is rude will not change. Making a comparison of a woman to a sharp object or lack thereof is not polite in my opinion.

Jason, do you find a lollipop man a rude word - because the man is in the shape of a lollipop. Oh dear.

Kirk Bevins wrote:

Jason Larsen wrote:Dinos, I must have left a lasting impression on you, but the fact that I think the word PENWOMAN is rude will not change. Making a comparison of a woman to a sharp object or lack thereof is not polite in my opinion.

Jason, do you find a lollipop man a rude word - because the man is in the shape of a lollipop. Oh dear.

That doesn't work if directed at an American. Jason would know him as a school crossing guard.

I think it's interesting how different swear words best suit different situations. If it's an exclamation of annoyance it's normally SHIT or FUCK for me. Maybe BOLLOCKS can work sometimes. I also think to annoy someone TWAT is often better than CUNT. Someone might like being called a cunt. It generally implies someone is horrible, whereas TWAT is more likely to imply some sort of ineptitude.

I'll tell you what annoys me (and I find this is becoming more and more of a common occurrence as the Hollywood film market changes)...
... the way that Americans pronounce TWAT as 'twart'. It makes me grimace every time I hear it.

Well, there's something wonderful about exclaiming "Oh, feck!" That and arse. What, they aren't swears?

Okay, I'm leaving, please don't throw sharp things at me!

Hannah O wrote:Well, there's something wonderful about exclaiming "Oh, feck!" That and arse. What, they aren't swears?

Okay, I'm leaving, please don't throw sharp things at me!

"Arse! Feck! Drink! Girls!" for any Father Ted fans.

I'll never grow tired of proclaiming 'arseburgers' (as used by Eric's boss in Stressed Eric) when things don't go to plan.

As in:

"...and then I shoved lettuce up my nose and gave it to a customer!"
"I know, we've got it on video"
"Oh arseburgers!"

You're funny, Kai!

You're apologizing to yourself!

Why was this trend started?

Jason Larsen wrote:Why was this trend started?

"Sorry Kai" was Doddy's catchphrase at the CoC, used to excuse himself when he swore in front of Kai (presumably as his mum was present). Being a drunken Irishman, this was often.

Thank you, Jon!

Then again, I know it's not but if you really meant to say that, you would be "kidding!"

Not really swearing but as this has been widened a bit to favourite expressions, I had to laugh when the character Vic (Michael Chikilis) in The Shield referred to a homosexual as a "cum burper"

Chris Corby wrote:I had to laugh when the character Vic (Michael Chikilis) in The Shield referred to a homosexual as a "cum burper"

Sounds like it should be part of a Latin motto or phrase. "I graduated from Yale magna cum burper."

Chris Corby wrote:Vic (Michael Chikilis) in The Shield

WHAT a show. Best TV I've seen for soooooo long. Highly recommended.

Right, Jon!