A disappointing announcement

[Jason Larsen]

Ladies and gentlemen, I was going to do a critique of the special US Labor Day edition of Countdown, but I can't because I won't be able to see it. Unfortunately, this was my only opportunity to do a critique.

As you can tell, I have kicked the habit of bumping old Countdown recaps because after a while they are out of date. I forgot the dates of the episodes I had originally planned to critique. Also, it is very time consuming. I am not trying to mock him or anything, but I am being as astute as Jon Corby when I write my critiques. I love to do that!

It breaks my heart to say what I just did, but I had to.

Thank you!

[David O'Donnell]

Ladies and gentlemen, I was going to do a critique of the special US Labor Day edition of Countdown, but I can't because I won't be able to see it. Unfortunately, this was my only opportunity to do a critique.

As you can tell, I have kicked the habit of bumping old Countdown recaps because after a while they are out of date. I forgot the dates of the episodes I had originally planned to critique. Also, it is very time consuming. I am not trying to mock him or anything, but I am being as astute as Jon Corby when I write my critiques. I love to do that!

It breaks my heart to say what I just did, but I had to.

Thank you!

Vastly superior I'd say. There are a few things you may need to consider first:

Acquisition:

You actually have to earn the right to recap, it's a serious business Jason. I wouldn't say you have to murder one of the existing recappers (since I'd subsequently be legally culpable) but let's just leave it that were someone, who currently is a recapper, to meet a nasty accident you'd be in a very strong position indeed. Of course psychological intimidation has earned certain unnamed people recapping posts before but it would be breaking a solemn oath for me to name JON CORBY here. This method may not succeed as the current crop of recappers have gained their immensely powerful position through demonstrating a mental toughness that was garnered in Al Qaeda training camps in the foothills of Pakistan. Again, I refer you to the nasty accident scenario.

Consolidation:

Having established yourself as a recapper you will need to possess superhuman powers of observation in order that your recap should contain as many double entendres and scatological references as possible: see Dinos for the latter and Chris Philpot for the former.

It's your call, Jason, do you still want to take it?

[Jason Larsen]

No, David.

[Jon Corby]

Oh yeah, I haven't done Thursday's recap yet. I might do it tonight.

Jason, what the fuck are you talking about?

[Jason Larsen]

It's self-explanatory, Jon.