C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Discuss anything interesting but not remotely Countdown-related here.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Sat Oct 15, 2016 10:03 pm

Two recent ones, not much Countdowny happened in them but each had their moments. Last night's saw me try to host COLIN only for Zubair Patel to steal my car and ram-raid the venue, and the one a few nights ago saw me running around Los Angeles without a clue, only to be transported to a shed in northern Scandinavia with an ice floor where a young girl keeps pulling pins out of grenades to see whether or not they're live. The Countdown aspect comes in when we ask her to show the grenades to Jack Worsley, as he's apparently an authority on explosives. Or we just want to kill Jack, I woke up at that point and never established what it was.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Euan Slatter » Sun Oct 16, 2016 6:56 am

I had one last night: I was at Co:Bris, and was doing all right (won one, lost one). However I suddenly realised I had my first job interview (yes, at 12!), so had to rush off. When I got there, I was late, so had to wait 5 hours. I went back to the competition, only to discover that the building had blown up, and people had said thy saw Nick Hewer in the area... Anyway, I went to watch City play (3-0 win vs Huddersfield), then went back to my interview. And who was conducting it?... Nick Hewer! And Brendon Cole in the corner of the room..... :). Anyway, I woke up then so don't know if I got the job, or even what it was for...!!!
COUNTDOWN or THE TUBE? Which is better? There's only one way to find out....

Call it a draw :)

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Matt Morrison » Tue Oct 18, 2016 8:11 am

A Robin McKay-Alan Young hybrid laughing at my small willy.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Sat Oct 22, 2016 11:45 am

One from a couple of nights ago....

I was in a pub I didn't know, which for some reason also had a KFC. Having ordered a popcorn chicken and pint, I realise that Callum Pickering is also at the bar, challenging people to fights. Andy Platt steps forward and knocks Callum out with a chair, and promptly makes a joke about chest hair. Andy then gets drenched with Carling as Callum steps up, but then morphs into Tracey Mills, who starts calling everyone WIGAN SCUM, before I walk out and find another bar.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Fri Nov 04, 2016 1:08 pm

One last night that I can only describe as myself, Zarte and Callum T doing Carpool karaoke.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Mark Deeks » Sun Nov 13, 2016 11:50 am

In last night's dream, I was in a pub, which, this being Dreamland, was also the assembly hall at my former school. It was a long thin rectangular hall, and a load of Countdown players (16 or so) were seated behind tables on the right hand side, all facing the left. It was a Co:Event under the highly mature name of "Co:Wank", which was taking place in the Scottish Highlands village of Cromary. [In hindsight, Co:Cro would have been a much better name. Or Co:marty] The host was an unidentified man in a really flowery shirt and cargo shorts with no hair and a big grey beard. The event began, and ended one round later, the solitary round of the day being a junior conundrum ["OUTNIER"]. Charlie solved it first, saying it out loud. I solved it second, saying it slightly louder. Then Lee Fisher solved it third, announcing it as loudly as he could, and everyone stopped playing to laugh at this.

Anyway, that was the end of the event, and thus it was prize giving time. The winner, announced to an extremely pathetic round of applause, was Charlie, who was playing under the extremely unfortunate soubriquet of "Sclerosis Thompson". However, Charlie received no actual prizes, only the applause. I was second, because even my subconscious can't give me credit for anything, and my round of applause was even worse. (The host of the event also couldn't say the word "Mark" right, which hindered proceedings for a while. He kept staying it as "Shtimph" for some reason." Can't imagine why.) I also got no prize. The prizes apparently began at third, which Lee collected to a cacophony applause - however, at some point between getting out of his chair and getting to the just-miraculously-appeared prizes table, he turned into a girl called Kara. Fourth place went to Stewart Gordon, who looked delighted, and then it was time for the raffle. The prizes table was suddenly filled with about 30 to 35 raffle prizes, most of which were alcoholic, and all of which were to be won by the same number. That winning number was announced by the host as being "380, pink ticket, STRONG." Stewart bounds back up with glee, hands over a pink ticket with 380 written on (for some reason it is about 10% bigger than all his losing tickets, and has the word "Twins?" written on it), and then grabs this giant bottle of champagne with two hands, bear-hugging it. He is as happy as happy can be.

A small side room randomly appears, with a big corner couch in it that takes up the entire room. I go in there and sit down with a drink. Jono is there. The following conversation happens:

ME: "...anyway, how have you been?"
JONO: "Oh shut up."

I wake up.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Fri Nov 18, 2016 4:57 pm

Two weird ones recently.

The first one saw me and a bunch of other people- including Callum Todd- trying to fix a car that had been rendered broken down thanks to its iPod being smashed. In our fumbling, we release the handbrake of the car and it goes speeding off at 30mph, eventually smashing into someone's front garden, resulting in us getting shouted at a lot by the house's owner. Also, Rowan Atkinson was there.

In last night's dream, I'm in London for the grand opening of Mark Deeks's new shop, which is a cross between a Forbidden Planet and a pool hall (complete with pool tables). Everyone agrees it's awesome, but before we get the chance to check out its upstairs, the clock hits 10pm (the shop's closing time) and Mark chucks us all out, 'us' meaning me, Gevin and Graeme. Graeme and I head back to the nearest rail station (Walthamstow) for the train home, only for Google to spaz out when I try to get directions and start playing Donald Tr*mp speeches instead. Eventually we find the station at the bottom of an embankment, resulting in me and Graeme sort-of sliding down on our feet before landing gracefully on the stairs that lead to the station, which has been closed for ages. Two policemen are there, investigating a series of bike thefts, which one of the policemen seems to think is a capital offence, leading to an argument between him and Graeme over what 'capital' actually means. Also, Jono was there.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Fri Nov 18, 2016 11:06 pm

James Laverty wrote:One last night that I can only describe as myself, Zarte and Callum T doing Carpool karaoke.
tbf, this does kind of happen. We've definitely had a sing in the car. Albeit not like... as OTT
Possibly the first contestant to accelerate with a mic clipped...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Euan Slatter » Sat Nov 19, 2016 7:47 am

Ben Wilson wrote: nearest rail station (Walthamstow) for the train home,
Central or Queen's Road? #Tube :geek:
COUNTDOWN or THE TUBE? Which is better? There's only one way to find out....

Call it a draw :)

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Chris Marshall » Sun Nov 20, 2016 11:03 pm

Ben Wilson wrote:Also, Rowan Atkinson was there.
Probably me.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Mon Nov 21, 2016 11:13 am

Chris Marshall wrote:
Ben Wilson wrote:Also, Rowan Atkinson was there.
Probably me.


:lol:
Possibly the first contestant to accelerate with a mic clipped...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Johnny Canuck » Mon Nov 21, 2016 1:56 pm

My subconscious came up with a 6-small selection in a dream the other night, which I believe was:

2 2 3 4 8 9 => 392

I didn't fully solve it until after I had woken up, but I do believe I managed to factorise the target to 49*8 while still in dreamland.
There are three erors in this semtence.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Mon Nov 21, 2016 3:07 pm

Clearly inspired by recent events, last night I dreamt I was watching Callum Pickering taking part in a dance off in the middle of a Nottingham nightclub. Maybe I should have put this in C4C nightmares?
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jennifer Steadman » Wed Nov 30, 2016 7:46 pm

Last night I dreamt that it was COLIN weekend. For some reason, on the Friday night a load of people including Ryan, Michelle, Graeme (who had an adorable knitted sleeping bag), Mark Deeks (who gave me unsolicited relationship advice and a pep talk) and Tom Carey were staying at Ben Wilson's flat, which was near Lincoln station. Tom and I went to the station at about 11am on the Saturday to get the train to North Hykeham; everyone else had already left.

However, we must have ended up getting the wrong train as the first stop was Nottingham, which in my subconscious was very close to Everton. Desperate to get there on time, I ran to the multi-storey motorway and started jumping over the side of the motorway bridges trying to flag down a lift, but it was unsuccessful and I returned to Nottingham station. Conscious that it was now midday, we were fucking miles away from the event and that this meant that: a) Tom and I would be late to arrive, b) Ben would rip the piss out of me for all eternity for being late AGAIN, and c) I would probably end up forfeiting my first game, I tried to book an Uber, but there were only 6 Uber drivers in the whole of 'Nottinghamshire' and they were all 50 miles away at least. Tom was being completely unhelpful and just staring gormlessly at me while I had a full-on meltdown, prostrating myself in front of a random woman and screaming "IT'S THE BIGGEST EVENT OF THE YEEEEEAR AND I'M GOING TO MISS ITTTTT", before howling and sobbing hysterically. I woke up in a cold sweat.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Wed Nov 30, 2016 8:59 pm

Jennifer Steadman wrote:I tried to book an Uber, but there were only 6 Uber drivers in the whole of 'Nottinghamshire' and they were all 50 miles away at least.
That would be an improvement to Uber in Nottinghamshire :P
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Wed Nov 30, 2016 9:19 pm

Jennifer Steadman wrote:b) Ben would rip the piss out of me for all eternity for being late AGAIN
As if I'd do that.

Hangover starts at 11am btw.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Sat Dec 10, 2016 11:59 am

Right then, last night. I'm at my late grandmother's house, which is in Lincoln, but for some reason, I'm hosting CoNot. I only realise it's CoNot day when Giles Hutchings and a skinhead Zarte Siempre show up, who I have difficulty telling apart. As they get themselves ready for round 1, I had into my grandmother's old conservatory to evict a bunch of people from her garden, when a torrential downpour starts and one of the participants gets pinned against the wall of the garage, requiring a rescue mission that no one can be bothered to actually carry out.

Once the rain subsides a little, a bunch of school children show up at the conservatory door with a carefully-produced questionnaire, asking me how a clock can win a computer. Apparently, despite me not knowing it was CoNot day, I'd produced posters for it (and apparently bought a laptop as first prize) and put one in the window, which attracted the schoolkids (who are all in uniform despite it presumably being a weekend) and lo and behold, I end up having to answer questions. Before I can do so, though, Thomas Carey kicks my foot, which results in me inadvertantly kicking over one of the schoolgirls. I get massive amounts of blame for this, even after she gets up and Thomas pushes her over again, which results in me missing round 1.

Apparently, all the rounds are played at the same time, so 6 letters selections, 2 numbers games and a conundrum instantly descend from the ceiling and everyone present starts trying to play them. I distinctly remember 2 of the letters selections- AFGELIRSU & AKILWYSWA- but before I can note any of the others Jessica from the apprentice shows up being really loud and unnecessary, which wakes me up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Thu Dec 22, 2016 8:17 pm

Two nights ago I was playing snooker in a televised tournament against Steve Davis, whacking him in one frame with a break of about 110 before accidentally potting the white instead of the break (anyone who's ever seen me play cue sports will attest that this is eerily accurate, apart from the 110 break thing). My next opponent is Graeme Cole, who breaks, and I then go on to pot a red, before potting a black, a red and a yellow in one shot, in that order. I then wake up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Sat Jan 14, 2017 9:43 pm

So last night I'm hosting CoNot, which luckily has a massive attendance (including Heather Styles, Alan Young, Stewart Gordon and a phenomenally pissed-off Matt Bayfield), but unluckily is taking place at the Guest House Paradiso. In between all the fighting, the usual football match is taking place whilst I try to round up all the scores from round 1. Unfortunately, this involves teaching an old woman how to add up, which takes so long that I still haven't had her final score by the time round 3 has finished. I wonder aloud how round 3 could even have been played without the round 1 scores, but I decide to roll with it and try to take the rest of the scores. Unfortunately, the next person I ask for their score is Deadpool, who instead of giving his score, sets off on a long-winded rant that lasts until I wake up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Matt Bayfield » Sun Jan 15, 2017 5:57 pm

Ben Wilson wrote:So last night I'm hosting CoNot, which luckily has a massive attendance (including a phenomenally pissed-off Matt Bayfield)...
That'll be the last time I attend one of your dreams where the round template is drawn from a hat. Gevin's Delight, indeed...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Wed Feb 01, 2017 8:55 pm

One I had before COLIN saw me having inadvertantly entered the Northern ireland Scrabble Championship despite the fact that it was taking place on the same day as COLIN (which it actually did this year). Long story short(er), I decide to blow off the Scrabble in favour of actually attending my own event and arrive just in time for the final round. In my absence, Eddy Byrne has been hosting the event and doing a decent job- he's adopted a 'top 8' style of format like was done at the FOCAL finals/Co Birmingham and has been handing out random spot prizes throughout the day (the next one to be handed out, for some reason, is a John Bishop DVD). Two of the players in the top 8 are Tom Carey and Rob Foster, the latter of whom is extremely disappointed with his Star Wars: The Force Awakens DVD. At this point, I wake up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Wed Feb 01, 2017 9:31 pm

I've been infected by the bug it seems...
Only a short dream, but a very peculiar one nonetheless.
It starts on apterous where I'm chatting away to people on there when out of the blue Giles Hutchings tells me he needs my help on something. It turns out he's got £1000000 to improve University Challenge and I was the obvious choice to be his helper (no idea why, since I don't even watch University Challenge). We then get teleported to the studio where University Challenge is filmed and Giles starts messing around with a random orange box there which seems to be opening and shutting by itself, complaining about how malfunctioning it is and how it definitely needs improvement. I very enthusiastically agree with this, despite being completely clueless as to what the actual function of the box is. Then I'm suddenly back in my house on apterous again, where I ask Giles where he got the £1000000 from and also get extremely frustrated with Callum Todd for leaving my college maths squad when we were about to win a huge event, and ask him why on earth he left. Neither of which garner any responses, which leaves me both concerned and annoyed.
Then I woke up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Thu Feb 02, 2017 2:38 pm

So, how to describe this last one, other than I think certain parts of it were inspired by recent events.

After a slight prologue consisting of me chatting to two korfball teammates about going on holiday, A whole load of apterites (I'm guessing around 40) get off a plane in Moscow for the first ever Co-event in Russia, complete with Jen wearing the (now sadly departed) Vladimir Putin mask. Andy Platt also tries to have a bet with me about how long it will take Eddy to get drunk over the weekend. A relatively peaceful pre-drinks gets interrupted when Robin and Tracey start some "banter", although this is ended when Callum Pickering, oddly dressed as a policeman, arrests them and takes them away to a Gulag....

The next morning sees Eddy arrive late for the event, carrying a TV from the hotel room saying "he'd rather not say what he did", which is taking place in the Red Square, with heavy snow also falling. As Aidan (who has apparantly organised the whole event) attempts to start the first round draw, instead everyone starts playing darts, Aidan doesn't mind this but a very annoyed Zarte tries to settle everyone down. Eventually everyone does when a dart thrown by Callum Todd misses the virtual board completely and smashes a window of the Kremlin. This prompts calm but the draw starts arguments when the supposedly seeded draw sees Jack Worsley, Dylan Taylor and Dan McColm on a table. Fin.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Euan Slatter » Sat Feb 04, 2017 7:30 am

I had one the other day where Robin McKay was in hospital dying from "620-itis". So I had to tell him that Wigan were the best in order to save him (that bit was hard). I never saw him again.
COUNTDOWN or THE TUBE? Which is better? There's only one way to find out....

Call it a draw :)

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Sun Feb 12, 2017 7:52 am

620-itis is probably stemmed from his horrible numbers game miss with a target of 620.

I had a weird dream last night...I dreamt that I'd gone to see a Countdown recording with a family friend, which for some reason was in the hall of my college. Just as I sat down, I received a text of Damian Eadie informing me that due to the fact that they were going to be a while in the dressing room, I would have to host the show myself (for some reason I was not remotely creeped out that a 47 year old man had somehow acquired my phone number). I asked him who the contestants were and I was told that they were ready near the stage (the stage!?), he also instructed me to allow a man at the back to solve a conundrum. So, I found the contestants and ended up running a game of Countdown with 3 players. The introductions of them all seemed to go well, I specifically recall one of them (an oldish woman) being interested in birdwatching and archaeology. I asked her if she'd ever dug up anything rare and was told no. Then we started the actual game...the letters board had not been put up, which meant we had to prop the letters against a wall. Ditto with the numbers games. I believe I was playing every single role at this point except the cameraman. One of the contestants (a male) then offered a word I was unsure of and I took to my phone to look it up (this was totally looking professional and could definitely be broadcast). I don't believe we'd even been keeping track of the scores, with me having just having a rough idea of who was where. It was at this point that we were joined by Rachel Riley, who helped us by putting the letters up onto the board which had just suddenly materialised out of nowhere. Eventually we got to the end and I wrapped it up and then insisted on doing some retakes, to which I was told by Damian (again by text) that everything was 'absolutely superb' and that 'no retakes at all were necessary'. I then left the stage and found Damian eating lunch. I went over and shook his hand and probably conversed about Countdown. Several people came up to me, including Ronnie Corbett (which was strange as I was aware in my dream that he was dead and yet just talked to him like nothing at all was wrong). I then found a goody bag and had a rummage through it. For some reason it contained 'a genuine ten pin bowling skittle'. At the exact moment I fished this 'wonderful' object out of the bag, my auntie and cousins came over and started throwing bowling pins everywhere, with each one having a number on the side which would apparently help to crack a secret code (I picked one up with the number 84 on). I asked Damian when the show would be broadcast and was told the 24th of February, before leaving and being completely overwhelmed by the amazing experience. Then I woke up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Euan Slatter » Sun Feb 12, 2017 9:43 am

You haven't linked, but I think I know what you mean!
COUNTDOWN or THE TUBE? Which is better? There's only one way to find out....

Call it a draw :)

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jennifer Steadman » Tue Feb 14, 2017 4:46 pm

Last night dreamt about CO:LON (being held in my primary school hall). Adam Gillard started dramatically announcing the finalists, which annoyed me because it was my event, and declared that Mark Deeks was in the final with 6 wins and 60 points in each game. (Mark looked grudgingly pleased about this.) I snatched the microphone off Adam to declare that the other finalist was "that lanky bastard, Ryan Taylor", who I somehow subconsciously knew had never been in an event final (#solidarity) and wished him luck.

Then I looked at the clock on the wall (wrong wall to real life) and realised we'd finished the 3rd round really early, at 3.45. An able-bodied Zarte smugly declared that he'd have held fire on announcing the finalists and had another round of games, which I couldn't now do because Mark and Ryan would have got angry. I got annoyed at Zarte instead. Fin.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Wed Feb 15, 2017 12:20 am

Another from last night (Monday night/Tuesday morning). I was at a recording (Matty Artell was also present), and we were shocked to find the DC guest for the day (said to be Katie Derham) had suddenly been replaced by Zarte. Z then comes upto us and asks me for the "diary", which I was confused about, but when I reached into my pocket, I did indeed find a diary. At this point Tom Carey and Eddy Byrne enter.

So we get to the first DC anecdote and Zarte reads from the diary, which turns out to be true stories that happened at Co-Events. After the recording Z gives me the diary back, which I find is in my handwriting, although I don't remember recording these events. What worries me now is I might have given him ideas. Fin.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Graeme Cole » Wed Feb 15, 2017 9:36 am

I dreamed that I was on Countdown and Susie's origins bit was something interesting about words related to marine animals. It was interesting enough that well into the next round I was distracted thinking about various fish parts and how they got their name, so I could only find a three letter word. Fin.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Thomas Cappleman » Wed Feb 15, 2017 10:15 am

Finally got one that I can remember some details of. Was at some CoEvent, and was looking through a Countdown calendar with Jack Hurst, trying to show him the picture of our final (no idea what final). However, it had for some reason been replaced by a picture of Conor holding a trophy from the evening before. Eventually my dream self concluded that this must have been a darts competition, now with a proper-sized trophy as the prize.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Wed Feb 15, 2017 11:52 am

Graeme Cole wrote:
Wed Feb 15, 2017 9:36 am
I dreamed that I was on Countdown and Susie's origins bit was something interesting about words related to marine animals. It was interesting enough that well into the next round I was distracted thinking about various fish parts and how they got their name, so I could only find a three letter word. Fin.
This may be one of the most magnificent posts on this thread, and I'm not even sure how true/deliberate some parts of it are.
Possibly the first contestant to accelerate with a mic clipped...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Thomas Cappleman » Wed Feb 15, 2017 1:35 pm

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Wed Feb 15, 2017 11:52 am
Graeme Cole wrote:
Wed Feb 15, 2017 9:36 am
I dreamed that I was on Countdown and Susie's origins bit was something interesting about words related to marine animals. It was interesting enough that well into the next round I was distracted thinking about various fish parts and how they got their name, so I could only find a three letter word. Fin.
This may be one of the most magnificent posts on this thread, and I'm not even sure how true/deliberate some parts of it are.
Graeme's mind automatically comes up with dreams that can be expressed as brilliant puns.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Graeme Cole » Thu Feb 16, 2017 12:28 am

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Wed Feb 15, 2017 11:52 am
Graeme Cole wrote:
Wed Feb 15, 2017 9:36 am
I dreamed that I was on Countdown and Susie's origins bit was something interesting about words related to marine animals. It was interesting enough that well into the next round I was distracted thinking about various fish parts and how they got their name, so I could only find a three letter word. Fin.
This may be one of the most magnificent posts on this thread, and I'm not even sure how true/deliberate some parts of it are.
I made it all up.

Jack Worsley
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jack Worsley » Mon Mar 06, 2017 6:55 am

Well, I hope the one I had last night wasn't ominous. It was Co:Manche day and I was travelling down by car with my dad. At one point, I looked at the clock and it read 15:34 (or something similar). We had set off early in the morning and I wondered how this could be, so he informed me that we had been stuck in a huge traffic jam and I had slept through it all. I was obviously concerned about how the event was running without my presence, especially as it was my responsibility to take essential equipment such as letters and numbers sets, conundrums and my laptop to the event. I then realised that I hadn't even remembered to bring any of these and I didn't even have my phone so I could contact Matty and explain what had happened. The dream ended with us on the streets of Manchester and we got lost just for good measure. I woke up before I could find out how Matty was coping (or failing to) or how much he wanted to kill me, probably for the best.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:27 pm

Not Countdown related, but thought this might be enjoyed anyway.

Had a dream where I was quite insistent that my gender identity was a sunflower, and I was in a relationship with Noel Edmonds that seemed to consist of me having sex with other people in the back of his taxi and occasionally stroking his beard. Genuinely one of the weirdest dreams I've ever had. Made weirder (and this is why I feel I can link here) by Noel at one point saying "Make sure to put this on the c4c dreams thread when you wake up"
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Gavin Chipper » Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:39 pm

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:27 pm
Not Countdown related, but thought this might be enjoyed anyway.

Had a dream where I was quite insistent that my gender identity was a sunflower, and I was in a relationship with Noel Edmonds that seemed to consist of me having sex with other people in the back of his taxi and occasionally stroking his beard. Genuinely one of the weirdest dreams I've ever had. Made weirder (and this is why I feel I can link here) by Noel at one point saying "Make sure to put this on the c4c dreams thread when you wake up"
That's absolutely brilliant.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jennifer Steadman » Mon Mar 20, 2017 4:16 pm

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Mon Mar 20, 2017 3:27 pm
Not Countdown related, but thought this might be enjoyed anyway.

Had a dream where I was quite insistent that my gender identity was a sunflower, and I was in a relationship with Noel Edmonds that seemed to consist of me having sex with other people in the back of his taxi and occasionally stroking his beard. Genuinely one of the weirdest dreams I've ever had. Made weirder (and this is why I feel I can link here) by Noel at one point saying "Make sure to put this on the c4c dreams thread when you wake up"
This has absolutely done me :'D
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Tue Mar 21, 2017 7:34 am

Right, so last night, I was at COLIN, where I'd shown up late, only arriving in time for the start of round 3, despite the fact that I was supposed to be hosting. Despite not being present, I had somehow managed to win 4 games out of 4 and was in 7th place. My third round opponents were Ryan Taylor and Sooty, and as I'd only just shown up, I was down to host first, where I discovered that things were very different than usual.

Rather than draw nine cards, letters games were pre-determined, like the numbers games at the first co.mk. People selected their first seven letters in whatever order they wanted and I had to find the correct order. However, the letters selections were handwritten by someone with either no hands or severe carpal tunnel, as they were barely legible, and I get extremely flustered trying to find one with 4 consonants and 3 vowels in that order (Ryan's selection). Eventually, I decide 'sod it' and give the players a typical COLIN selection with 3 Os and 2 Is. However, both players find the word 'sooty' from the selection, which excites Sooty no end, so we spend the rest of the dream looking up 'sooty' in the dictionary (apparently it means something to do with soot) before looking up other encyclopedic entries and swear words. Despite Sooty being in the dream, Charlie Reams is nowhere to be seen.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Mark Deeks » Tue May 02, 2017 7:23 am

Jono had a brief cameo in a dream of mine that was otherwise unrelated to Countdown. He accosted me in the street, held up a giant photo of his face, and basically shouted at me, "AM I MORE ATTRACTIVE HERE [points at his current face] OR THERE? [points at giant photo]". I said the photo, because it had been digitally edited to make him look like a manga character. He was very unhappy with this answer and flounced off. Vain, shouty and needy.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Gavin Chipper » Tue May 02, 2017 8:08 am

Mark Deeks wrote:
Tue May 02, 2017 7:23 am
Jono had a brief cameo in a dream of mine that was otherwise unrelated to Countdown. He accosted me in the street, held up a giant photo of his face, and basically shouted at me, "AM I MORE ATTRACTIVE HERE [points at his current face] OR THERE? [points at giant photo]". I said the photo, because it had been digitally edited to make him look like a manga character. He was very unhappy with this answer and flounced off. Vain, shouty and needy.
That wasn't a dream.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Thu May 11, 2017 10:40 am

Bit of a mixed group dream last night. I was playing korfball with a few teammates, familiar opponents and for some reason, a couple of apterites that included Zarte, Tom C, Matty, Jen and someone I didn't recognise who claimed to be Matty's sister. Unfortunately the fun was ruined by the arrival of Theresa May, who complains that the korfball posts aren't (you guessed it) "strong and stable" enough. Zarte proceeds to slide tackle the PM, who then suddenly decides to leave and make Zarte the new Prime Minister. Tom and Matty proceed to hoist Zarte up on their shoulders, but spectacularly fall on the floor.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Mon May 15, 2017 6:32 am

Last night was an odd one.

Then, all of a sudden, I'm on a train, sat behind Giles, who's embroiled in an argument with both the train conductor and a girl in a seat opposite about paying the fee. The train is travelling from Lincoln to Morocco, as rail travel is clearly the most sensible option there. Zarte and Jen then arrive, as does Andy, having apparently escaped from police custody. I remark that the finalists from series 68 and 69 are all here (yeah, yeah, I know), then say 'I wish more countdowners were here, like Zarte'. Giles then points out that Zarte arrived five seconds ago, to which I go 'duh, step forward Zarte Siempre', causing literally the entire train to cringe at me.

When I wake up, I'm on a train heading from Lincoln to Manchester to CoManche. I change trains at Newark, only to discover that I'm actually in Hykeham station (which is a hell of a lot busier and more complicated in design than the 'two bus stops' that Hykeham station actually is). At this point I haven't figured out that this is still a dream, so I start writing down details of the previous dream, hence why details about it are crap and it begins in medias res. I do this instead of texting Andy (who is apparently organising CoManche this year) or ringing home to say I'm not going to Manchester (it being about 11:45am). However, I then wake up, forget about the first part of the first dream (which involved me and Andy Platt on the run from the law) and get really pissed off as I'd written down a lot of it in dream #2.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Mon May 15, 2017 12:10 pm

James Laverty wrote:
Thu May 11, 2017 10:40 am
Bit of a mixed group dream last night. I was playing korfball with a few teammates, familiar opponents and for some reason, a couple of apterites that included Zarte, Tom C, Matty, Jen and someone I didn't recognise who claimed to be Matty's sister. Unfortunately the fun was ruined by the arrival of Theresa May, who complains that the korfball posts aren't (you guessed it) "strong and stable" enough. Zarte proceeds to slide tackle the PM, who then suddenly decides to leave and make Zarte the new Prime Minister. Tom and Matty proceed to hoist Zarte up on their shoulders, but spectacularly fall on the floor.
I heartily endorse this idea.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Gavin Chipper » Mon May 15, 2017 3:00 pm

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Mon May 15, 2017 12:10 pm
James Laverty wrote:
Thu May 11, 2017 10:40 am
Bit of a mixed group dream last night. I was playing korfball with a few teammates, familiar opponents and for some reason, a couple of apterites that included Zarte, Tom C, Matty, Jen and someone I didn't recognise who claimed to be Matty's sister. Unfortunately the fun was ruined by the arrival of Theresa May, who complains that the korfball posts aren't (you guessed it) "strong and stable" enough. Zarte proceeds to slide tackle the PM, who then suddenly decides to leave and make Zarte the new Prime Minister. Tom and Matty proceed to hoist Zarte up on their shoulders, but spectacularly fall on the floor.
I heartily endorse this idea.
Can't be any worse than the current situation!

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Thomas Carey » Mon May 15, 2017 4:02 pm

Gavin Chipper wrote:
Mon May 15, 2017 3:00 pm
Zarte Siempre wrote:
Mon May 15, 2017 12:10 pm
James Laverty wrote:
Thu May 11, 2017 10:40 am
Bit of a mixed group dream last night. I was playing korfball with a few teammates, familiar opponents and for some reason, a couple of apterites that included Zarte, Tom C, Matty, Jen and someone I didn't recognise who claimed to be Matty's sister. Unfortunately the fun was ruined by the arrival of Theresa May, who complains that the korfball posts aren't (you guessed it) "strong and stable" enough. Zarte proceeds to slide tackle the PM, who then suddenly decides to leave and make Zarte the new Prime Minister. Tom and Matty proceed to hoist Zarte up on their shoulders, but spectacularly fall on the floor.
I heartily endorse this idea.
Can't be any worse than the current situation!
Everything about the dream is perfect.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jennifer Steadman » Tue May 16, 2017 9:28 pm

While looking for something else, I found this in a message chat from 2013 and I'm pretty sure I never posted it on here:

"I dreamt I was in Asda, except the aisle I was in was more like a mix between Argos and Toys R Us, and was playing with various toys - my favourite was this amazing bouncing wheelchair. Anyway, Ryan and Michelle were walking around doing their shopping in the next aisle, and Ryan was being an absolute nuisance asking for fishy nuggets. He kept asking the same Asda employee (a 10 year old girl wearing my secondary school's quite hideous summer dress) where they were and, when she said they had none, if she'd checked to see if there were any fishy nuggets in the beer section. He was being REALLY LOUD about it and started kicking off. Poor Michelle looked so embarrassed as she struggled to carry her shopping basket, like a tired mother trying to control her tearaway child. Then I got bored of his tantrum and went back to the toy aisle, where my mum offered to buy me a Jigglypuff hairclip. (There were loads of Pokemon themed hair products.) Slightly more happened before that, including winning a pub quiz at uni and me bailing on the prize of a breakfast at a posh restaurant with my lecturer so I could go to the toy aisle at Asda, but that bit's hazier than the fishy nuggets row. Fin."
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Mon Jul 03, 2017 9:26 pm

Okay, I've had a fairly sizeable fever the last few nights so last night's was a bit of a whopper. I start here, walking up Lincoln High Street with my aunt and uncle, challenging them to count the number of churches we pass en route to the railway station. Feel free to play along, by the way- the number you should reach (going down the road you face when you click on the link, including the one you're stood next to) is nine in the space of just over a mile. Anyways, our walk takes us up to Lincoln's very aptly-named Steep Hill, which I walk up alone (my aunt and uncle apparently going 'sod that' to the idea of walking up the hill, and who can blame them). However, I discover that carved into Steep Hill is a fairly sizeable complex, and to gain access to the top of the hill, you have to run through a fairly tough gauntlet of challenges, a bit like a Crystal Maze-type thing.

What happens next is a bit difficult to explain. Often when I'm dreaming, I remember having dreamed the dream before, even though I never have. I suddenly remember that I've had the dream three or four times before (I hadn't) so me and my sudden travelling companions (which include the Cat from Red Dwarf) decide to try to circumvent the challenges by sneaking into an elevator we know to be the final step of the challenges. However, our circumvention is itself circumvented when we're taken downwards, not upwards, and deposited in a large Wetherspoons at the bottom of Steep Hill (there isn't one there- don't bother checking) where I immediately locate Jono and whinge to him about the situation. Jono reveals that Michelle Nevitt is the nefarious architect of the challenges, so I walk over to where she's playing pool and shout at her until she agrees to scrap the challenges and let anyone who wants to get to the top of the hill, get to the top of the hill.

I then head outside the pub, where I'm greeted by a few friends from work and discover that the manager of the pub makes their own bread by boiling it in a fishpond, which I somehow remember as being the best bread I've ever tasted, so I head back inside to order sandwiches for everyone. At that point, a 91 year old woman wearing glasses literally runs past, saying she 'needs to get away from him'. My mum then appears, points at the carpet of the pub, the pattern of which is the old woman's glasses, and asks me if I want that carpet in my bedroom. At that point, I wake up.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Fri Jul 07, 2017 5:56 am

Two rather short ones from last night. Not as good as Ben's are but I'll post them anyway.

The first one is where I'm perusing Mike Brown's Countdown experiences page, and discover a hidden link to the 'updated version' which, remarkably, contains the experience of Angus Burns (the one it says is coming soon on the actual real life page) and a person from my form who definitely hasn't been on, amongst others. It had a lovely even darker blue background too. However, Mike has decided to put all the names in anagram form on the website, and somehow I'm able to unscramble every single one despite not ever having heard of the contestants before. It then turns out he's preparing a 2016/2017 experiences book, which I managed to preview and was disappointingly empty. I then have a conversation with someone who tells me to put the link to the website on the c4countdown thread dedicated to it (which also exists in real life), however I don't seem to carry out this task. Dream ends or at least I don't recall what happened if it continued.

The next one involves me in a class who have been assigned a project on 'whatever we want'. I decide to do it on Julian Fell, and 2 other people join me in doing it. So I get his apterous wiki page up (which, I kid you not, is exactly the same as the real life one and I even recall sentences and the picture that are the same as real life). I then go off on a tangent about how he is the greatest player, or at least one of them, to a person who asks who he is (why join me to do a project on him if you haven't a clue who he is...). I then get interrupted by the leader of this project, who is also an exact spit of a teacher I know in real life, who insists that he told us all to do a project on Beyoncé instead. I then justify my actions as being perfectly within the rules and give a string of links that link Julian Fell to Beyoncé (I believe it was something like Beyoncé-Ariana Grande-Jay Z-music-theme music-game shows-countdown-contestants-Julian Fell). I don't recall what happened after this, if anything at all.
Last edited by Elliott Mellor on Fri Jul 07, 2017 9:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Fri Jul 07, 2017 9:36 pm

Wish my dreams were on par with Ben's though.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Mon Jul 10, 2017 9:25 am

Was challenged last night by Susie Dent to compete against Andy in a "who can find this word in a massive book that is part-dictionary, part-encyclopedia, part puzzle book the quickest" to make it look like someone was in dictionary corner when a celebrity guest hadn't turned up.

When we asked her why we didn't just... act as DC guests, she shouted "SO *YOU'RE* TRYING TO TAKE MY JOB TOO NOW?!?!" and got in a huff that held up filming and we had to calm her down from.

Eventually a very shit quality but high-entertainment game happened when filming resumed between some woman I didn't recognise who had 3 wins and kept scoring about 80, and a slighty dense young West Country bloke, who instead of saying "Good afternoon Rachel" said "Alright, m'lover" and carried on in that vein then on.

Odd dream.
Possibly the first contestant to accelerate with a mic clipped...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Sat Jul 15, 2017 7:14 pm

Had a dream last night where I was competing in a game of apterous against a low ranked apterite who shall remain unnamed because of what happens. Basically it turns out to produce some 9s this game, 2 to be precise (RETAINAGE and UNREALISM/SEMILUNAR)...we both get both of them and it goes to a crucial, which I get beaten to (fairly certain the answer was a nonsense word). This consequently causes me to lose 87 rating points. Infuriated, I accuse this person of cheating, claiming there is no way this person could possibly have spotted these 9s, and must have used lexplorer. I then appeal to Charlie to discount the game and give me my rating points back. I then get woken up at 5AM so have no idea how it concludes.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Thu Jul 20, 2017 8:59 am

So last night I dreamed it was the end of the very first ever 'Co:Sleepover' event at the Ark in Hykeham, which featured me and about 10 others, well, sleeping over in the Ark's smaller hall, which proves a challenge for me as I manage to prop my sleeping bag between two tables of different heights, meaning I sleep at an uncomfortable diagonal. The tournament was to commemorate the tenth anniversary of Chris Marshall being murdered in a gangland shooting. I'm rudley awoken at 7:55 am (in the dream) by a policeman banging on the door explaining that the Ark's manager had been arrested for something, but as I had only hired the Ark until 8am and she hadn't been arrested until 8:15am (just go with it) I myself won't be held criminally liable, so while the policeman explains the situation to the others (including a remarkably energetic Mark Deeks) I make Gevin his double breakfast in a cup that has two compartments, one on top of the other. In the bottom is a cup of tea drank with a straw, in the top is a small bowl of oatmeal, and the outside of the cup is decorated like a can of Heinz Baked Beans, only instead of 'Baked Beans' it says 'Fucking Great Breakfast'. I then wake up for real.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Thomas Carey » Thu Jul 20, 2017 10:16 am

Best one yet tbh
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Thu Jul 20, 2017 12:05 pm

For some reason last nights dream took place at the coMK venue. Don't remember the entire dream but Zarte's appeared as a hologram throughout the dream (is this the plan for next month?) and at one point somebody threatened to kill Gyles Brandreth.
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Zarte Siempre » Thu Jul 20, 2017 4:13 pm

James Laverty wrote:
Thu Jul 20, 2017 12:05 pm
For some reason last nights dream took place at the coMK venue. Don't remember the entire dream but Zarte's appeared as a hologram throughout the dream (is this the plan for next month?) and at one point somebody threatened to kill Gyles Brandreth.
It's worked well enough for the last 2 years.

I suspect the Brandreth death was also me.
Possibly the first contestant to accelerate with a mic clipped...

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by James Laverty » Wed Jul 26, 2017 11:31 am

Zarte Siempre wrote:
Thu Jul 20, 2017 4:13 pm
James Laverty wrote:
Thu Jul 20, 2017 12:05 pm
For some reason last nights dream took place at the coMK venue. Don't remember the entire dream but Zarte's appeared as a hologram throughout the dream (is this the plan for next month?) and at one point somebody threatened to kill Gyles Brandreth.
I suspect the Brandreth death was also me.
Maybe, but somehow I doubt you are the only person who isn't overly fond of him
Definitely not Jamie McNeill or Schrodinger's Cat....

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Ben Wilson » Sun Jul 30, 2017 11:28 am

Last night's dream saw me walking through Lincoln when I suddenly run into Matt Bayfield, Lauren Hamer and Jono. We decide to head toward the hospital for a catchup (why there I have no idea) and spend the next several minutes wandering through several back streets of the city following Matt's navigation and eventually end up at a hospital, just not the right one. And for some reason, it's full of teenagers. A quick check of my phone reveals that we're actually closer to Hykeham than we are our destination (why this is significant, I don't know), and when we get outside, Matt throws the mother of all tantrums at getting the instructions wrong. I then wake up, only to discover that it's 4am and there's a big mac meal on my bedside table. This seems odd, but when I find out that the meal is cold, it suddenly makes logical sense, so I start to eat the cold French fries, before waking up for real.

I also had a dream last night where I was being given a piggy back by someone in a Princess Peach costume, before meeting up with Lee Fisher and going to a nearby Poundstretcher to buy crisps. That's probably as close to a sex dream as I'll ever get.

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Elliott Mellor » Sat Aug 05, 2017 7:37 pm

Just a brief one last night in which I dreamt that it turned out Johnny Canuck turned out to be the series 52 champion and that he'd always been utterly ashamed of this and didn't want anyone to know (yet had edited the wiki to say so...).

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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Jennifer Steadman » Sat Aug 05, 2017 9:34 pm

I HAD ONE WHERE THOMAS CAREY TOOK CONTROL OF MY LAPTOP.
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Re: C4C/apto/Countdown Dreams

Post by Matt Morrison » Sat Aug 05, 2017 9:41 pm

HEATHER HAD ONE WHERE I HAD THE HAIR OF BOB DE CAUX.

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