c4countdown

Mark Deeks

People who slap the table when they laugh.

Mark Deeks

People with combovers. Luckily they're quite poor liars so it's easy to detect the dishonesty.

Mark Deeks

Paul Kaye?

Mark Deeks

Was it your dad?

Mark Deeks

Charlie Reams wrote:This marks an interesting change from the norm. Psychics have, for obvious reasons, generally acted as if they are above resorting to legal means. If they fight this (and I think they will) it could be very significant.

The unintentional comedy in that 404 message is fantastic.

Mark Deeks

Gavin Chipper wrote:
Mark Deeks wrote:FIFA rules mandate three keepers for some reason.
Can't they just say someone else is a goalkeeper?

Well it'd be pretty obvious that they were lying. But yeah it's an odd rule. If a team wants to take a small gamble taking only two, let them. If it costs them, that's their loss.

Mark Deeks

FIFA rules mandate three keepers for some reason.

Mark Deeks

David Baddiel.

Mark Deeks

Mark Deeks

Mark Deeks wrote:
Graeme Cole wrote:Lesley Hines
Was PREFUCK really valid back then?

Mark Deeks

When are you and Gevin going to move in together, anyway?

Mark Deeks

Yeah. Or, they could just award the person a random amount of money picked out at random. Perhaps by a machine that selected random balls with numbers on them. Almost like a lottery, if you will.

Mark Deeks

^ They've added this new thing now where, after the final box, you can choose to gamble what you wound up with on "Box 23," which either doubles what you won, halves it, adds ten grand to it, leaves it unchanged, or takes it all. Hmm. How do they decide what goes in it then? Is this expli...

Mark Deeks

Preening, obviously.

Mark Deeks

I still haven't solved that numbers.

Mark Deeks

^ They've added this new thing now where, after the final box, you can choose to gamble what you wound up with on "Box 23," which either doubles what you won, halves it, adds ten grand to it, leaves it unchanged, or takes it all.

Mark Deeks

I wish the next time I watch Glengarry Glenn Ross could be the first time.

Mark Deeks

Will definitely not be there. Sorry

Mark Deeks

Graeme Cole wrote:Lesley Hines

Was PREFUCK really valid back then?

Mark Deeks

Didn't realise you were into Wu Tang to be honest.

Mark Deeks

I had rocky creek at each way cos it sounded a bit vaginal. The strategy comes through once again.

Mark Deeks

I have a similar strategy to Graeme whereby I bet on the ones whose names are most like genitals. This strategy has led to a considerable lifetime profit after Ballabriggs's victory in 2011. Then I recommend Pineau de Re, or "The Royal Penis" as it probably translates to. Dude, there's on...

Mark Deeks

I have a similar strategy to Graeme whereby I bet on the ones whose names are most like genitals. This strategy has led to a considerable lifetime profit after Ballabriggs's victory in 2011.

Mark Deeks

PHILTRUM.

Mark Deeks

Yay Matt! They aired it!

Mark Deeks

Oh that's bad. Sad times.

RIP Peter. He ensouled the show.

Mark Deeks

Might have to rescind on this hammer frayed.

Mark Deeks

Susanna Reid is leaving? Damn. She's always fun to wake up to.

Mark Deeks

I'll start the nominations now, there's a few categories I don't want to answer due to being discriminating so I've omitted those > Best Maths Whizz - Callum Todd > Best Wordsmith (can be person who spot amazing word e.g. NAARTJIES) - Callum Todd > Best of Speed Conundrum - Callum Todd > Best of Ap...

Mark Deeks

Fine in theory but the categories are a bit obvious and predictable to answer. It needs to be more subjective, like a proper awards show. So, Apterite You'd Most Like To Play Darts With, Apterite You Could Most Envision Setting Up A Small Business With, Best Costume, Apterite Whose Name Could Pass O...

Mark Deeks

This all seems a bit more cumbersome than just the words "don't do it".

Mark Deeks

...you're exploiting a shortcoming in the studio logistics to give yourself an advantage in the game, and I definitely think that's against the spirit of the game, and worth trying to stamp out. I agree with this, but I'm not sure I'd then reach the conclusion that it's the player's responsibility ...

Mark Deeks

I don't think playing to the stated rules can be likened to playing with one hand tied behind your back.

Mark Deeks

Pretty much next door, but there's a decent chance I will be in America that week, so no commitment yet.

Mark Deeks

I think you just accused someone in particular.

Mark Deeks

Do you realise how ungrateful some of these comments come across? Be respectful.

Mark Deeks

The size and nature of the audience don't really demand it.

Mark Deeks

I don't think Vitabiotics value it that highly.

Mark Deeks

Two feet isn't difficult. But zero feet is an option very much available to you.

Mark Deeks

ANGRIEST ANTISERA ARTESIAN ARTINESS BANISTER CANISTER DETRAINS ENTRAILS ENTRAINS GANISTER GANTRIES HAIRNETS INGRATES LATRINES MINARETS NARKIEST NITRATES NOTARIES NOTARISE PAINTERS PANTRIES PERTAINS PINASTER RAIMENTS RAINIEST RANDIEST RANGIEST RATLINES REINSTAL REPAINTS RESINATE RESTRAIN RETRAINS RET...

Mark Deeks

That turned me on so much that I wet myself a little. While sitting down.

Mark Deeks

You're obsessed by the effort thing, aren't you? I'm going to film myself pulling down my trousers and sitting down just to show you how easy it is.

Mark Deeks

I just don't go for a piss with a semi. Not everyone is as constantly bonered up as you, remember that.

Mark Deeks

I would argue that the effort involved in pulling your trousers and pants down (and up again afterwards), moving into the sitting position and having to stand up again at the end is far more effort than simply standing throughout. And anyway I fundamentally disagree with the premise that standing f...

Mark Deeks

How is life with Michelle, anyway?

Mark Deeks

Depends if they're weeing into a toilet or just spraying it over whatever happens to be in front of them.

Mark Deeks

Also, sometimes after you're weeing, you realise you need a poo as well. Well guess what bros, if you're sitting down, you are RIGHT THERE. Primed and ready. So make that five glorious reasons why sitting to wee is the way forward. I shall not be oppressed by your bigotry.

Mark Deeks

I sit down to urinate when the option is realistically available and I have done my whole life. I harbour no shame about this. To me, it is the infinitely more logical way to approach things. Of course, there are ignorant people on this planet who find this a comical thing to do, and who like to tak...

Mark Deeks

Yeah well you should have had more milk as a child. Not my fault.

Mark Deeks

Well then let's debate. True or false - tall people should get paid more because they have to spend more to live normal lives, on things such as food, water bills for washing, custom made freaky clown shoes, etc.

Mark Deeks

Stop derailing the topic.

Mark Deeks

We can talk about stuff if you like.

If Jeremy Paxman and Jeremy Kyle both lunged wildly at you with a carving knife and a homicidal intent, which one do you think you could disarm the quickest?

Mark Deeks

Andy Platt wrote:Good, because if you three vowel more than half of your rounds then I'm blocking you on apterous.

(Meant in jest, but actually.... )

FINALLY FREE

Mark Deeks

Steven, your posts so far have been either a) about how good you are at a game different to the one around which this forum is based, or b) very sarcastic. I think it's alienating people.

Mark Deeks

GET IN!!!! (I say to myself. )

The hell you did.

Mark Deeks

I wasn't there so my opinion is a bit redundant, but, given that it's a morning-after thing, maybe make it start a bit later?

Mark Deeks

Graeme Cole wrote:
szodiac wrote:I am sure there must be a dozen or so forumites who would gladly present Countdown if given a chance.
Plenty would. None could.

Except Mark Deeks.

Should Nick leave, I will ask with complete seriousness. I will also be turned down with complete seriousness, but there we go.

Mark Deeks

Yeah but Jono has one of those faces you can't help but trust.

Mark Deeks

And that Mark's unerring generosity when it comes to giving impromptu and repeated lifts between Travelodge and pub never fails to impress me and has made Colin markedly more comfortable for myself and Heather for three years now. And his car even has that authentic taxi smell. It's my way of repay...

Mark Deeks

Oh so YOU'RE who I caught this bastard of a cold from, David.

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